Welcome to the Jest-A-Day Journal published by Samantics Press
February 21st - Today is the 52nd day of the year, with only 313 days remaining in 2006.

February Flowers - Violet, Primrose
February Birthstone - Amethyst (Sincerity)

Jest-A-Day Journal Celebrates Today's ThemeNational Ski Association Birthday
The National Ski Association, now known as the United States Skiing Association, was formed in 1904 at Ishpeming, Michigan.

The Jest-A-Day Journal Moon Phases
"Universal Time" (UT) which is sometimes referred to, now colloquially, as "Greenwich Mean Time" (GMT)
LAST QUARTER - Feb 21   7:17 a.m.
NEW MOON - Feb 28   0:32 a.m.
FIRST QUARTER - Mar 6   8:15 p.m.
FULL MOON - Mar 14   11:35 p.m.

The Jest-A-Day Journal Humor List
UNACCEPTABLE EXCUSES FOR NOT SKIING
It's too cold. / It's too hot.
They're checking tickets today.
I don't feel like it.
I'm hangover.
I'm reading Powder.
My mother-in-law is in town.
I ate a bad burrito.
I've got to work.
I couldn't get a babysitter.
I am a babysitter.
It's a Malaysian national holiday.
My car won't start.
My roommates car won't start.
My girlfriend's cousin's car won't start.
It's snowing. / It's not snowing.
It's too icy.
I'm broke.
I haven't finished reading the Skier's Responsibility Code.
The lift lines are going to suck.
My feet hurt.
I've got wicked gas.
There's an asteroid headed toward the Earth.
The pass is closed.
I have a court appearance.
The mountain's on wind hold.
It's August.
My car doors are frozen solid.
I've got a mid-term tomorrow.
I have to come up with a list of stupid excuses.
I'm a big fat lard ass.

ACCEPTABLE EXCUSES
I'm dead.

The Jest-A-Day Journal Celebrity Birthdays
ACTING -
1915 Ann Sheridan, Denton TX, actress (Dodge City, Another World) [D: 01/21/67]
1931 Larry Hagman, TV actor (I Dream of Jeannie, Dallas)
1934 Rue McClanahan, Healdton OK, actress (Maude, Golden Girls)
1937 Gary Lockwood, Van Nuys CA, actor (2001, Survival Zone, Lieutenant)
1946 Tyne Daly, Madison WI, actress (Cagney & Lacey, Judging Amy)
1946 Alan Rickman, London England, actor (Robin Hood Prince of Thieves, Die Hard)
1953 William Petersen, Evanston IL, actor (Grissom-CSI: Crime Scene Investigation)
1963 William Baldwin, Massapequa NY, actor (Backdraft, Flatliners)
1979 Jennifer Love Hewitt, Waco TX, actress/producer (Ghost Whisperer)

ARTISTIC -
1907 Wystan Hugh Auden, York England, poet (Age of Anxiety-Pulitzer 1948) [D: 09/29/73
1925 David Samuel "Sam" Peckinpah, Fresno CA, film director (The Wild Bunch, Straw Dogs)
1927 Erma Bombeck, Dayton OH, humorist (At Wit's End) [D: 04/22/96]

HISTORIC -
1794 Antonio López de Santa Anna, President of México (1833-55) Led attack against the Alamo [D: 06/21/1876]

MUSIC -
1893 Andrés Segovia, Linares Spain, considered father of modern classical guitar [D: 06/03/87]
1933 Nina Simone (Eunice Waymon), Tyron NC, singer/pianist ("I Loves You Porgy") [D: 04/21/2003]
1943 David Geffen, NY NY, record executive/producer/philanthropist (Geffen Records-1975)
1958 Mary-Chapin Carpenter, Princeton NJ, country singer (This Shirt, Shooting Straight in the Dark)

SCIENCE -
1964 Mark E Kelly, Orange NJ, CDR USN/astronaut (STS-108)
1964 Scott J Kelly, Orange NJ, CDR USN/astronaut (STS-103)

SPORTS -
1937 Ron Clarke, Australia, runner (set 17 world records)
1958 Jake Steinfeld, exercise expert (Body by Jake)
1958 Alan Trammel, Garden Grove CA, shortstop (Tigers) World Series '84/Golden Gloves x2
1971 Terry Mickens, Tallahassee FL, NFL wide receiver (Green Bay Packers-Superbowl XXXI)

The Jest-A-Day Journal Today In History
1431 England begins trial against Joan of Arc.
1875 Jeanne Calment was born, going on to live for 122 years 164 days, the longest confirmed lifespan for any human being in history.
1878 First telephone directory (with 50 names) issued (New Haven CT).
1885 The newly completed Washington Monument is dedicated.
1902 Dr Harvey Cushing, first US brain surgeon, does his first brain operation.
1925 First issue of "New Yorker" magazine published.
1947 In New York City Edwin Land demonstrates the first "instant camera", the Polaroid Land Camera, to a meeting of the Optical Society of America.
1952 The government of Winston Churchill abolishes Identity Cards in the UK to "set the people free".
1953 Francis Crick and James D. Watson discover the structure of the DNA molecule.
1965 Malcolm X is assassinated at the Audubon Ballroom in New York City by members of the Nation of Islam.
1974 The last Israeli soldiers leave the west bank of the Suez Canal in carrying out a truce with Egypt.
1995 Steve Fossett lands in Leader, Saskatchewan, Canada becoming the first person to make a solo flight across the Pacific Ocean in a balloon.
MORE EVENTS

The Jest-A-Day Journal World-Wide Celebrations - source http://www.earthcalendar.net/

SOURCE: Earth Calendar
Birthday of King Harald V - Norway
Ekushey Day (Martyr's Day) - Bangladesh
Shaheed Dibash - Bangladesh

The Jest-A-Day Journal Humor For The Day
Q: How do you get a snowboarder off your porch?
A: Pay for the pizza.
Q: How many Extreme Skiers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Twenty, one to make the actual turns, and then 19 to point up and say. "I could have done that."
Q: How does a snowboarder introduce themselves?
A: Ohhh - sorry dude!
Q: How do you become a millionaire as a professional skier?
A: Start out a billionaire.
Q: What's the difference between a government bond and a ski bum?
A: A government bond will eventually mature and make money.
Q: What is the difference between God and a ski instructor?
A: God does not think he is a ski instructor.
Q: A car has five snowboarders in the back seat. What do you call the driver?
A: Sheriff.
Q: What do you call a snowboarder with no girlfriend?
A: Homeless.

The Jest-A-Day Journal Quote For The Day
I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill. - Erma Bombeck

The Jest-A-Day Journal Daffynition from WordFoolery
SKIER: One who pays an arm and a leg for the opportunity to break them. (Henry Bread and Roy McKie)

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