Welcome to the Jest-A-Day Journal published by Samantics Press
March 19th - Today is the 78th day of the year, with only 287 days remaining in 2006.
Mars' Month - March was the original beginning of the year, and the time for the resumption of war.
March Flowers: Daffodil or Jonquil [Yellow] -  Affection, Cheerfulness, Desire, Grants Wishes, New Beginnings, Respect, and Sympathy
March Birthstone: Aquamarine, Bloodstone - Courage

Jest-A-Day Journal Celebrates Today's ThemeThe Genesis Awards
Every year, the Genesis Awards pays tribute to the major news and entertainment media for producing outstanding works such as these, which raise public understanding of animal issues. Why the name Genesis? The book of Genesis tells the story of Noah and the Ark and is, therefore, the first "news report" of an animal rescue! Genesis is also the word for "beginnings," and as such, the humane community is witness to the world's emerging awakening to animal suffering.

The Jest-A-Day Journal Moon Phases
"Universal Time" (UT) which is sometimes referred to, now colloquially, as "Greenwich Mean Time" (GMT)
FULL MOON - Mar 14   11:35 p.m.
LAST QUARTER - Mar 22   7:10 p.m.
NEW MOON - Mar 29   10:16 a.m.
FIRST QUARTER - Apr 5   12:01 p.m.

The Jest-A-Day Journal Humor List
LIFE LESSONS I'VE LEARNED FROM NOAH
1. Don't miss the boat.
2. Remember that we are all in the same boat.
3. Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the Ark.
4. Stay fit. When you're 600 years old someone may ask you to do something really big.
5. Don't listen to critics, just get on with the job that needs to be done.
6. Build your future on high ground.
7. For safety's sake travel in pairs.
8. Speed isn't everything. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.
9. When you're stressed, float awhile.
10. Remember the Ark was built by amateurs, the Titanic by professionals.
11. If you can't fight or flee -- float.
12. Take care of your animals as if they were the last ones on earth.
13. When the doo-doo gets really deep, don't sit there and complain -- grab a shovel.
14. Stay below deck during the storm.
15. If you have to start over, have a friend by your side.
16. Remember that the woodpeckers INSIDE are often a bigger threat than the storm outside.
17. When you're stressed, float a while.
18. No matter the storm, when you are with God there's always a rainbow waiting.

The Jest-A-Day Journal Celebrity Birthdays
ACTING -
1894 Jackie "Moms" Mabley (Loretta Aiken), Brevard NC, comedienne (Merv Griffin Show) [D: 05/23/75]
1923 Tige Andrews, Brooklyn NY, actor (Captain Greer-Mod Squad)
1936 Ursula Andress, Berne Switzerland, actress (Dr No, She, Sensuous Nurse)
1947 Glenn Close, Greenwich CT, actress (The Big Chill, Fatal Attraction)
1955 (Walter) Bruce Willis, Idar-Oberstein W Germany, actor (Moonlighting, Die Hard, 16 Blocks)
1969 Connor Trinneer, Wall Walla WA, actor ("Trip"-Star Trek: Enterprise)

ARTISTIC -
1933 Philip Roth, Newark NJ, novelist (Goodbye Columbus, Portnoy's Complaint)

HISTORIC -
1734 Thomas McKean, New London Township PA, attorney (signed Declaration of Independence) [D: 06/24/1817]
1848 Wyatt Earp, Monmouth IL, marshal-fought in Gunfight at the OK Corral [D: 01/13/29]
1860 William Jennings Bryan, Salem IL, "The Great Commoner" orator/statesman [D: 07/26/25]
1891 Earl Warren, LA CA, (Gov-R-CA)/14th Supreme Court Chief Justice (1953-69) [D: 07/09/74]
1904 John J Sirica, Waterbury CT, US federal judge (Watergate hearings) [D: 08/14/92]
1925 Brent Scowcroft, Ogden UT, Lieutenant General (USAF)/National Security Council
1944 Lynda Bird Johnson Robb, Washington DC, LBJ's daughter
1944 Sirhan Sirhan, Jerusalem, Robert F. Kennedy assassin

MUSIC -
1930 Ornette Coleman, Ft Worth TX, jazz composer (Downbeat Musician of Year 1966)
1937 Clarence "Frogman" Henry, Algiers LA, musician (You Always Hurt the One You Love-Forrest Gump)
1946 Ruth Pointer, Oakland CA, singer (Pointer Sisters-I'm So Excited)
1953 Ricky Wilson, Athens, GA, guitarist (B-52's-Love Shack) [D: 10/12/85]

SCIENCE -
1813 David Livingstone, Blantyre Scotland, explorer (found by Stanley in Africa) [D: 05/01/1873]
1900 (Jean) Frédéric Joliot-Curie, Paris Frane, physicist (Nobel '35) [D: 08/14/58]
1943 Mario J. Molina, Mexico City Mexico, Earth's ozone layer vs CFCs/Nobel '95

SPORTS -
1914 J Jay Berwanger, Dubuque IA, first Heisman Trophy winner (1935) [D: 06/26/2002]
1927 Richie Ashburn, Tilden NE, NL infielder (Phillies)/sportscaster/HoF '95 [D: 09/09/97]

The Jest-A-Day Journal Today In History
1831 The City Bank of New York becomes the site of the first bank robbery in United States history ($245,000 taken).
1915 Pluto is photographed for the first time but was not recognized as a planet.
1916 Eight American planes take off in pursuit of Pancho Villa, the first United States air-combat mission in history.
1918 Congress authorizes time zones and approves daylight saving time.
1928 "Amos & Andy" debuts on radio (NBC Blue Network-WMAQ Chicago).
1931 Nevada legalizes gambling.
1942 FDR orders men between 45 and 64 to register for non-military duty.
1964 Sean Connery's first day of shooting on "Goldfinger".
1975 Pennsylvania is first state to allow girls to compete with boys in High School sports
1979 House of Representatives begins live TV broadcasts via C-SPAN.
1997 Supreme Court hears Internet indecency arguments.
2003 The invasion of Iraq begins (with the time difference, it actually begins on March 20 at 0100 UTC)
MORE EVENTS

The Jest-A-Day Journal World-Wide Celebrations - source http://www.earthcalendar.net/

SOURCE: Earth Calendar
Battle of March - Dominican Republic
San José - Peru
St., Joseph Expression de la juridiction Legba - Haiti
St. Joseph's Day - Brazil, Costa Rica, Liechtenstein, Malta, San
Marino, Spain, Switzerland, Vatican City State, Venezuela

The Jest-A-Day Journal Humor For The Day
AN ARK
The old man was waiting for a bus on the wettest, rainiest day this spring. A lady was standing next to him, so he tried to be friendly and make conversation...

"If this rain keeps up, we'll all have to chip in and buy an ark," the old man said to her.

"What's an ark?" she asked.

"You mean you haven't heard about Noah and the great flood, and all those animals?" he asked incredulously.

"Look, mister," she replied, "I've only been in town for four days. I've scarcely had time to read a paper."

The Jest-A-Day Journal Quote For The Day
"The biblical account of Noah's Ark and the Flood is perhaps the most implausible story for fundamentalists to defend. Where, for example, while loading his ark, did Noah find penguins and polar bears in Palestine?" - Judith Hayes quotes

The Jest-A-Day Journal Daffynition from WordFoolery
NO ACCOUNT: Ark animal census. (WordFoolery)

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